31.3.2015

About Love and Fear (My March Newsletter here as well)

I probably have mentioned earlier that if there is any book one should read, that would be the Mind Over Medicine, written by Lissa Rankin, M.D and healer. It is just absolutely awesome if you are interested in healing process and holistic well-being in general.

Now I got her second book in my hands, a new one "Fear Cure". I just love it.
It is just most simply put discernments without any judgement about how we normally live our lives and how our decisions are guided within. And how that can be non-working for our higher self or soul calling as I would say it.

I work a lot with people's belief structures and value systems. These are exactly the ones that drive our identification and decision base in life. I love shaking the non-working structures we have inherited, created, adopted, learned or what we just carry around from somewhere as our baggage. It is like a weight that prevents us making decisions with a free spirit, mind and love.

Fear can be present in so many forms and it is not recognized as fear. Examples: Overly controlling life is fear. Saying yes when you mean no is fear. Saying no when you mean yes is fear. Being overly careful or not fully open up in relationships is fear. Striving or demanding perfection is fear. Settling for less is fear. Only a couple of examples here.

Lissa talks about false fear and true fear. True fear saves us from physically threatening situations. False fear is based on our thoughts on consequences of something. And this is totally depending on our belief and value system that we currently hold. And that fear can have a firm grip on our daily life and way forward. If your mind is empty of thoughts, you are out of false fear. Simply.

One simple way to gently observe own reasoning is to ask gently on the verge of an act or decision from self: Am I doing this out of fear (broadly understood) or out of love (broadly understood)?

I have been applying this in all my actions recently; if for example something feels uncomfortable and I my tendency would be avoiding that, I am gently asking myself: is this out of fear I am avoiding this or out of love towards my self? Sometimes it is good not to push through, then it would be out of love towards self not to go for it. But if not doing it that happens out of fear, you may miss something truly important and avoid something in general in your life. Sometimes you may also push through out of fear, too, and that may be equally non-constructive.

I have found many small occasions where the fear has tried to take over but as I have realized that, I proudly have chosen the other way. And felt extremely good afterwards. It is also easier and easier to recognize the underlying motives of small self. And the less baggage we carry, the easier it gets all the time. One can be really free, once dismantling own anchors.

I am so happy and I feel that I am exactly on the right track with my life now.I have dropped as much as baggage as I can recognize and strive for as little anchors as possible. It feels so genuinely fantastic and never thought it can be possible. Being honest with self is one of the toughest lessons during this lifetime but I assure you it is worth it.

How are you guided or how do you want to be guided?

I wish you (de)lightful spring days!



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7.1.2015

Towards new 2015

It has been quiet from my side recently.
The end of last year took all my energy to keep everything together, never have I felt the world so black as it physically and metaphorically for a little while was. It is only now afterwards I understand that. So sorry for silence.
Lots and lots of good things happened also. From mental pain emerges all kinds of great stuff. You are forced to, once again, dig and find the good stuff that is there (as there always is) and I figured I actually could not have it better. It was fear based darkness I was struggling with. Fear of not making it businesswise, fear of losing a really good friend, fear of not knowing what to do with life as everything seemed messy and pointless, many things I tried did not work out and insecureness kicked in. On the other hand I felt all possible circles closing in a very positive way, and that made me cry many times. Letting go is not easy but when that happens, it is absolutely relieving.
There is room for a lot of new beauty now.
It is not easy to walk the path you have chosen. It takes all the courage to go on, when the outside world pressure (which is actually only inside, programmed in you) kicks in. It takes every bit of will power to say no to the non-working programming and go along your own path.
I have been so lucky. I am surrounded by angels, good beautiful people, mostly even new in my life, who probably unknowingly carried me through the darkness. Love, joy, closeness, hope, one friendly word, sharing, is all it takes sometimes. It changes everything even though nothing as you can see physically changes.
Thank you all for being there when I just needed a tiny friendly word, a bit of encouragement, a thank you, a small praise, a warm hug.
It is amazing how a small thing can change everything. It is almost scary.
It has everything to do about the perspective.
As I write this, the horizon from my window is dark orange and totally bright, really amazingly strong colours, sun is rising. I feel the same happening in my life. This year will be something new and unimaginable now. So many exciting things are emerging right now. Cannot wait to write about them when they realize.
So pls look for the small good things in life, trust on your fellow traveler and lean on other people and share, if you have it rough. You are not alone, that's for sure.
I wish you a beautiful and meaningful New Year 2015.
Big hug,
Erja

28.10.2014

Take me in ! New job idea!

A friend of mine, a HR director in a big company, casually happened to mention to me that a company saves 150 000e if one premature pension due to illness is avoided. This made me think.

Well, how do you avoid those then in a most feasible way? Or what can you contribute in a company to avoid that happening?  I would not have to work much and would almost guarantee that one time 150 000 is saved. Or even smaller scale, within a function where people feel bad, give a channel to discuss safely the feelings, frustrations and find possible solutions for everyday life at work to go on more smoothly. Couldn't that be even a competitive advantage for a company if people felt they can talk to somebody, other than boss or a doctor? Kind of get help to assess the seriousness and possible ways to see and means to change a certain situation?

One of the most common and diagnosed illnesses today is depression. People are lost, tired, barely find meaning in their doings. There are many ways you can prevent that, without medicine. By challenging your thought patterns, belief systems, ways you look at the world, nutrition, exercise, you name it. The cocktail for each of us needs to be different, but workable for most. Before the illness or diagnose kicks in. I am an expert in creating that cocktail.

How about establishing this low threshold "listening ear" with coaching and mental healing capabilities before traditional doctors and medicine are needed? How about taking prevention into use also within a company? Save doctors' time for patients and use something like me for preventive measures?

I could come to your premises, charge per hours I stay, for example 3 hours a day or one day at a week or whatever suitable or needed, no social security or other employee payments necessary. I have a full toolbox of various methods and leadership practises I can utilise and have gotten appraisals for those too. Some of those can be seen on my Linkedin profile Erja profile or Mixing Nuts webpages testimonials Erja testimonials.

Only thing you need to do is to offer me a peaceful space and advertise internally within your company and we are ready to try!

Just a simple idea, but I truly think it could work !! Just come and hire me (or give me a seat) now! Let us see where this can lead to ! There is not much to loose but quite a lot to gain!

What do you think?

27.8.2014

Ordinary Days in Life - "Arki" in FInnish

I have been thinking about this word "Arki". It does not exist in any other language than Finnish (not that I know of anyway). I looked it up in a dictionary and it was translated "Ordinary or **Non-special days of life**". Hmmm. How can we Finns live non-special days of life, most of our lives?

Many Finns live "Arki" 110%. In Arki it is ok to complain, to be bored,  just survive, pay the bills, plan the duties, execute what ever is needed in Maslow hierarchy the bottom layer (ok, maybe 2 bottoms).

I DISLIKE THAT WORD!! It should be deleted from Finnish vocabulary as the connotation to the word has become so dark, or at least it is used that way. It also gives you a great  excuse to play small if you want. Not to go after your dreams, not to challenge yourself, not to live fully, not to enjoy.  "Well, this is my "arki", I will have my holiday next year, already counting days for that..."

What if, just asking, every day was a small celebration? A small celebration of existing, breathing, having beautiful people around, being able to choose anything, express self, enjoy, laugh, smell, touch, relate, just be, love deeply. It is a perception of the reality. Only. You can shift it if you want.

Could we start using the "arki" differently  and  soon find it translated in a dictionary as "Everyday series of tiny celebrations or "Special days of life?"

See my whole August Newsletter with my current favourite recipe and new training idea here:


23.7.2014

About (my) Spirituality



Greetings from a superb trip from Peru. Here something I wrote on my monthly newsletter today.

I have not thought I am particularly spiritual. I know my view of life and the universe has changed quite a lot during recent years, and I figured it is because I have had time to reflect and think about life and our purpose here. I have also been commented lately that I carry a lot of light, a lot of good energy. I do not know if that earlier has been the case, but at least it is noticeable now in a way that people comment, and almost weekly. Has this something to do with spirituality? I think yes.
So what is it then that makes one "spiritual"? I have figured this is a difficult question to many, and in many occasions people rather skip this when raised (especially in corporate well-being settings). I also got a comment recently from a person that he "would not get my spirituality ever, as he is not religious". Wow, that struck me. I need to express here specifically that my spirituality has nothing to do with religion(s). Religions mostly claim that a person is small and sinful, and somebody from up above may save you (and that you are sinful by nature). Or that you need to behave in a certain way to "earn" a better life in the future. I do not believe that one bit. I believe we all carry the good within, and can express it. The more we find it within, the better place the world is. It is also unity with the world, not separation. To be able to express love is spirituality, to me.
My healing practises and how I started practising this relate to growing into being a conscious human, in many levels. Firstly it has meant that I had to look deep and hard into my own wounds and issues in this life and acknowledge those. What then followed was that I was able to turn those into my strengths and learn the related healing techniques so that I am able to help others, too. These are thousands of years old healing wisdom, methods and rituals of Andean people, which recently have been exposed to western knowledge. Spiritual, yes, if spirituality is understood in a broad meaning of including a bit of understanding or an attempt to understand everything we cannot see with our eyes and reason with our logical brain (our brain, the rational one handles only 10% of the overall information). Just surrender to what is and can be.
I know time is not only linear; I know there are other realms than our current physical world ; I know energy is as real as matter; I know universe is there for us; I relate to nature and all physical beings here and nature is of outmost importance to me; I hear or sense more than is said; I know we live many lives. Do I understand all paranormal phenomenon or get what all people are doing in this field? Definitely no. I just know that there is a lot to understand and learn, and let all of us be as we are. Life is precious as it is and we are all given an opportunity to live the fullest life we are able to.
I also know from my holistic well-being studies that some form of spirituality is an essential part of the total well-being. What are the ways you can relate to this?
Found this recently, this might give an idea also, if you are struggling with the meaning.
20 signs you are a spiritually healthy person
***
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11.5.2014

Stop Defending your Fears


I saw this title STOP DEFENDING YOUR FEARS in an article Happiness in your life -Newsletter  and I just love this topic, so a couple of thoughts also by me about this.

I relate this to a thing called a backdoor. We create backdoors consciously and many times even unconsciously, and stick to them (I think I have written about these earlier as well). What does this mean?

Backdoor is something you use not to fully commit to what you desire. Backdoor is a good excuse not to act on your soul's best interest. Backdoor is always based on some kind of fear. Fear of failure:  what if I cannot make it? Fear of embarrassment: who am I to dream THAT because I already have this? Fear of being cocky: this is what people are satisfied with, so who am I to ask for my extreme happiness? Fear of being selfish: this is good enough, I settle with this. Fear of acting agains society's "standards" i.e. not fitting into crowd: I cannot divorce because my kids will suffer. Fear of non-success: I cannot quit my job because I lose my level of living standards. Fear of facing own and other's feelings: I keep side affairs so that I can stay married because I "have to". Fear of being honestly you: white lies are ok so that I do not have to hurt other people. Fear of putting boundaries: It is good always to be kind not to hurt other people. The backdoors are endless. The fears can be quite dominating in running your life script.

When I started my business I realized that my biggest fear was not to succeed in what I love the most. I mean how hurtful could that be if you put and commit yourself 100% to something and then you fail? (This goes for relationships in my life, too). It would have been comforting to my mind taking a side job or not to start at all, based on my fear, as then I did not have to put myself at stake. BUT. The big but. What would have I missed if I did not do everything I can and imagine and dream (still in the process btw). It was then I realized that whatever happens, I do my 110% now, and if I do not make it, then fine. Then I make a graceful exit but at least there are no "what if's" no "holding backs". The backdoors are such that afterwards you think "Damn. What if I did that differently, what if I had the courage. What if I just had listened to myself, really".

I wish you courage to kick your fears, close at least some of your backdoors and go enjoy fully the beautiful spring!! And your whole life for that matter. 


8.2.2014

About trust and and balance and human soul

I have recently been encountering "stuff" that has made me confront myself in terms of faith; about the future, about how to live our life, about how to be in this world.

I was sitting in a meeting, where a finnish writer was talking about her world view in general (she is a bit older lady already), and I could not avoid hearing the pessimism or maybe put it a bit more clear, mistrust, for the future survival of humanity. It made me wonder. Also recently met people have made me ponder about trust in life in general.

There is currently a huge imbalance on earth. We have destroyed so much in the name of progress and productivity,  and we mostly have forgot humanity and life itself. Efficiency is what prevails currently in many societies and structures of the economics, the way things are set up. How far does it serve a human soul?

On the other hand so many people have acknowledged that something is missing, something is totally off-balance, something is terribly wrong. I do believe our future generations are viewing this situation from a very different angle than ours and a couple of older ones. We have emphasized rational thinking in the name of progress in creating current world structures,  and this may not work any more. We have associated rationality with intelligence.  Rationality is not that fond of emotions, well-being, courage, warmth, empathy, love, harmony, universe, peace, nature. Rationality works well with outer environment (to a certain point) but what about our inner environment? There are 8 other intelligence definitions than rationality.  Maybe it is time to take into use other forms of thinking to counterbalance this where we are now.  Solution can be closer than we think, just if we change the perception. Shift altogether. Put our priorities in a new order and change the angle. It is possible.

Call me naive or whatever, but I choose to live in a world where I see beauty. I close tv when war news and accident news are on, politicians talk nonsense or violence dominates. I choose to act in communities which strengthen the feeling of accountability, shared responsibility and faith for the future. Power based on loving individuality driven collectively, intuition and collective soul will take over at some point. The question is only when. As Alberto Villoldo says: Let us dream our world into being. We can do it, together. What you believe in and set your intention to, will manifest. Sooner or later.

See how you can see something not that expected here:
Sometimes security cameras show something totally different

What is your intention?